Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Women and their closets

I’ll let you in on a little secret. Women are rarely happy with the way they look. At least the women I know. They all want to be thinner or in better shape. And they NEVER get rid of any clothes that ever fit them when they WERE thinner or in better shape. NEVER.

So I, for instance, have a closet FULL of clothes that don’t fit me. Because I hate to buy clothes in a size I don’t want to be.

It’s been about ten years since I have been anywhere near a size that I actually wanted to be. Which means there are lots of clothes in my closet that haven’t seen the light of day in a very long time.

But do I get rid of them? NO. Why? Because SOMEDAY I WILL BE THAT SIZE AGAIN!

Strangely enough, I’m very quick to unload clothes that are too big for me. So when I did the Phen-Fenn “I don’t care if I EVER eat” diet and lost the most weight I ever lost as an adult, I was happy to offload my “big” clothes on someone else who could wear them.

Yeah, that made it even harder to deal with when I gained all that weight back and not only did I have to look at myself in the mirror every day and bemoan my lack of self control in the food department, but I also had next to nothing to wear.

Did I get rid of any of my “small” clothes? HECK NO. I have clothes whose styles will not come back for another 20 years (because eventually every bad clothing idea comes back). But I refuse to donate them to a thrift store. There is a minuscule chance that SOME DAY I’ll wear them again.

You notice that, even with a track history of gaining lost weight back, I still got rid of the big clothes.

And that’s why right now, I have the pants of Sharon’s past - recent enough past that I haven't had a chance to get rid of them yet. When I wear them, I need a belt to ensure I don’t resemble the teenage guys who seem to want to share their underwear with everyone.

And I have the pants of Sharon’s future, which I can manage to squeeze my ass into if I really try. But just because a person can get a pair of pants zipped that in no way means they should actually inflict them on the public.

The pants of Sharon’s present? Nowhere to be found.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sharon - I really like your blog! I just read all the articles (well, it's Sunday and I have to read about a hundred pages about chromatin remodelling, so why not read the cool stuff first?). I really love your new dishes and I laughed a lot about the issue with the cabinet. Joe and my dad are very much alike in that way - they go crazy if it's not perfect.

Well, have a nice weekend.

Love, Anne

Sharon said...

Anne, you should just bring your hundred pages over here and read them on spring break with us! We're planning a trip to Portland (Powell's - yippee!) and then to the coast where we'll stop at every lighthouse on our way down to the Redwoods, then San Francisco for a couple of days, then home via Grandpa Dave's place. Haven't decided whether we'll try to fit in Yosemite or stay closer to Dave's place and explore a cavern. Wish you could come with us! We're bringing an extra exchange student with us - a girl from Germany. So, you'll be there in proxy! Love you!